The Awkward Summer Months

How to survive being home for the summer?

The end of spring semester is an incredibly stressful and exciting time. Classes are creating stacks of papers, presentations, and tests needing to be done. Apartment complexes are creating and distributing check outs for those moving out. Motivation and focus are dwindling as the outside weather improves.

The end of finishing finals and homework is exciting. Moving back home for the summer...maybe not so much. There is a sense of uncertainty when approaching your high school bedroom after having a year of college experience. Everything has changed since saying good-bye to that bedroom, so how are you suppose to act being back home?

Adjusting to being home for the summer will take time and will take re-adjusting, no matter how many summers you return. It takes balance to create a fun-filled summer while remaining on good terms with the parents. The awkwardness of the summer  months needs to be embraced while both student and parents rediscover their boundaries.

In less than three weeks, I will be moving back home for the third summer and I will again be adjusting living with my teenage siblings and parents. Through the last two summers, my parents and I have figured out ways balance my independence under their rules but there is no fool-proof or correct way of adjusting coming home.

Here are a few things to remember when moving back home for the summer:

Be Respectful 

After living with non-family individuals, you should understand how crucial mutual respect is when creating a pleasant household. The same principle relates when returning back to your parents house. Try to reevaluate your actions and what could be changed to accommodate those sleeping during your midnight meals and Netflix binges. Caroline from Grown & Flown reminds all college students, "you are not at school and your actions are affecting a lot more than just yourself now." 

Remember the Perks

After 9 months of surviving on junk food, Ramen noodles, and any free food the idea of coming home to food that has already bought is glorious. No more coin operated laundry machines, no more using your whole paycheck to pay rent, and no more obnoxious neighbors keeping you awake. You are home. This is just a brief list of some of the perks of returning home for the summer so next time you complain, don't. Remember the perks. 

Get a Job

You should understand how refreshing spending time alone is after living with roommates. The same is true when living back at home for the summer. Balancing your summer break with a job that is enjoyable is a great way to expand your network, make money, and grant you time away from your family. Samantha from Learning Advisor says, "Staying out of the house is a sure way to avoid conflict, but it take it a step further, and do something meaningful with time you spend away." 

Pick Your Battles 

Now that you are home, you are back to rules and chores that are generally enforced better than the RA's in your college dorm. With the sudden change of environment and expectations, it could be easy to pick a fight for everything is asked of you but that wouldn't result in an enjoyable summer. It is important to remember that you are no longer in high school; you are a college student that has passed through their "rebellious" stage and can take out the trash. 

Be Aware of the Obligations 

Your home is no longer filled with young college students gaining their independence, having spontaneous movie marathons or Mario Kart tournaments. You are back home with your parents who will most likely want to know where you are and who is coming over. There is sense of obligation of asking who can come over and if you can leave once you are back at home. Ashley from Thought Catalog says, "The often feel uncomfortable and strange to revert back to your 'under age 18' days, in order to maintain peace and harmony in the house."

How do YOU adjust going home for the summer? Comment Below! 

Monday Motivation

Even the best of us need to have a cheat day and enjoy a burger. 

The Reality of Roommates

How to survive college roommates?

When moving away to college, the idea of living with strangers can be distressing. Roommate concerns are real and normal. Living with non-family members for an extended period of time can be a challenging change as personalities clash and roommates discover who they want to become.

Every roommate and group of roommates will be different and each will provide a new college experience. Living with roommates will present many learning opportunities whether it be about each other, yourselves, or how to handle conflicts.

Leeyen Roger, from Society 19 shares some advice on getting along with college roommates, "People are unique and different, and your roommate will most likely not have the same living, studying, sleeping, and social habits and that's okay." +SOCIETY19

At the end of April, I will have lived with my third set of roommates during my college years. Through these last three years, I have learned a lot about myself and I'm still learning on how to be a better roommate. With the help of other college bloggers and personal experiences, I have collected a few tips on surviving college roommates.

Roommates 2014-2015

Communicate

Communication starts as soon the roommate information emails are sent and should be moderately maintained after your 'roommate' time period. Effective communication with roommates is crucial for having an enjoyable experience and relieving tensions that arise. It is important to note that communication won't always be clear and won't fix everything instantly; it takes constant effort.

Samantha from As Life Grows recommends, "Make sure you keep communication going once you guys move are living together...and talk to them freely." In the past, my roommates and I would communicate on what we would be bring and willing to share for that year and stayed in contact through Facebook and texting. While my current roommates and I didn't exchange summer emails and will most likely stay contact through Snapchat and Instagram.

Alone Time

Alone time is crucial for maintaining a sense of sanity while in college. This time can be spent in various ways: reading, exercising, napping, or talking on the phone. Allowing alone time with benefit yourself and your emotions, as well as your roommates, and then the time spent together will be enjoyed more.

Dorothy from Prep In Your Step shares, "In college you are surrounded by people nearly all the time so a little alone time...is nice!" In the past when I shared a room, I would spend my alone time exercising or in my car talking to my family and friends and it did help clear my mind and be more positive around others.

Roommates 2013-2014

Bond Together

Living with people in close quarters for an extended period will most likely lead to conversations, meals together, and to actually bonding with each other. Spending time together is an obvious answer but it is remarkable how much that can influence the overall experience of that year. When spending time to bond together, it can help improve other parts of the relationship.

Dorothy from Prep In Your Step recommends, "Just by offering you are allowing your roommate to see that you want to get along and you are finding ways to grow closer." In the past, my roommates and I would spend time together by baking treats and throwing water balloons at people. Currently, my roommates and I spend our time together by eating food and having movie nights.

Set Boundaries Early

Most apartments in college, the rooms are shared and the general living area is tiny; which in turns leaves roommates in very close quarters. Without open communication and already set boundaries tensions and conflicts can form very easily. Setting boundaries will create open communication on what should or shouldn't be happening and can create a sense of safety for all roommates involved.

Alisha Krywiak from Society 19 shares, "When setting your boundaries with the other person be very clear about your expectations." In the past, my roommates and I weren't good on setting boundaries on boyfriends and when the conflict rose, it was very challenging so I made sure to set that boundary the following year.

Roommates 2015-2016

Be Mindful 

As mentioned above, college apartments tend to lack in space so it is a crucial component to be mindful of the affects of actions or behaviors. When listening to music or watching a movie, opt for headphones for the studying roommate. When having friends over, opt for a warning text or message to inform roommates. Being mindful of actions and their affects can play a big part in the overall roommate experience.

Jessica Pawlarczk from College Candy and Alisha Krywiak from Society 19 recommend, "To make an effort to think about your actions affect others." In the past, my room roommate and I were very mindful in what time we went to bed and woke up, which in turned helped each other sleep despite the different habits. Currently, my roommates are great at being mindful of their actions after midnight because I'm going to bed before them.

Just Friends

Unfortunately, not every roommate relationship will follow the movies and stories of being best friends and forever involved in each other lives. Sometimes roommates don't get along and that's okay. Being civil and respectful is crucial to keep a positive, safe environment throughout the apartment.

Megan from Love Megan June and Erin from Very Erin recommend, "Don't force a friendship that isn't going to happen." In the past, I have had some roommates that I was closer to than others and had a distinct roommate that was very difficult to gain a friendship with but I still treated her with respect and always attempted some sort of conversation.

Quirks

Everyone has their own quirks, including you. Everyone has been raised different, experienced different things, and have their own opinions and outlooks on life. These difference are what makes each of us are own individual and may cause tensions or conflicts. When conflicts arise, it is important to remember that if someone's quirks are bothering you, your quirks might be bothering them too. Take a step back, breathe, communicate, and focus on the positive.


For more tips and advice on college roommates, check out my Pinterest.

What have YOU learned from roommates? Comment Below! 

Monday Motivation

Get off the couch and enjoy every moment in life.